Some Things You Just Shouldn't Know
by Shadow'sIllusionist
Summary: Dante finds out about Trish's secret hobby. Revised ending.


**Some Things You Just Shouldn't Know**

Disclaimer: Don't own Devil May Cry

A/N: My first story!! This idea came to me randomly and I hope you like it.

xxxxxxxx

"Hey, Trish! Phone for you. It's Lady!" Dante shouted up the stairs for the blonde huntress.

Moment's later, Trish came hopping off the stairs and promptly plopped herself onto Dante's desk while grabbing the receiver from his hand.

"Hey girl. Glad you called. I just finished—" Trish stopped talking and shot Dante a sideways glance. The platinum haired half-demon took the hint and started for the stairs. He understood that Trish liked her privacy when she talked about who-knows-what on the phone. He also knew that she wasn't likely to get off anytime soon.

_Women._

"Dante, stay away from my computer, okay?!"

"Yeah, yeah."

Ever since Trish insisted on getting a computer, she'd spent all her free time holed up in her room. She also wouldn't allow Dante to go anywhere near her PC for some strange reason.

Recently, he was getting annoyed at Trish for constantly hogging it all to herself. Hadn't Dante been the one to pull out the cash for the new desktop? He was also curious to find out what it was that he wasn't allowed to see.

Rounding the corner at the top of the stairs, he checked to make sure Trish was still busy on the phone. Hearing his partner's muffled voice downstairs put his fears to rest. He was going to find out what was on that computer whether Trish liked it or not. This was the perfect chance. After all, knowing Dante, what was more tempting than forbidden fruit?The half-devil stealthily crept into Trish's room.

The sleek black personal computer sat on top of a small desk situated across from her pristinely made bed. The blonde was a neat freak and every corner of her black-painted bedroom was clean and dusted, a sharp contrast to Dante's, which, was so cluttered and disorganized that it might as well have been the city dump.

Dante parked himself into the wheeled chair and proceeded to invade Trish's privacy.

She had two windows opened on the monitor, one was an Internet Explorer page and the other was Microsoft Word.

_Funny, never thought of Trish as much of a writer._

Enlarging the Internet page, he saw that it was opened to a site called "Fanfiction .net – Unleash Your Imagination". Dante raised an eyebrow. He couldn't wait to see where this led.

A few clicks later, Dante was at Trish's account profile. She was logged in as HotBlondeBabe666. Go figure.

The demon hunter surfed through and found a list of the blonde's stories. They were all categorized for Devil May Cry. Silently laughing to himself, Dante clicked the first story that came up, "Forbidden Love", with every intention of sniggering at whatever twisted romance Trish had come up with. Nothing quite prepared him for what he read next.

"It was a beautiful night and the pale moonlight streamed through the open windows of the dark room. What was happening here was something so passionate and forbidden.

Two naked white haired men lay on top of the tangled bed sheets. They engaged in a brief struggle before Dante, the younger of the two was forced into submission by Vergil, the older and more experienced brother.

Vergil pressed up close to Dante and everything suddenly felt hot. The younger twin moaned in pleasure as Vergil began—"

The real Dante stopped reading then and there for the sake of his sanity. He'd felt it slowly slipping away as he read more and more of the warped, incestuous, sorry-excuse-for-a-story.

This was an insult. Not only was it degrading, it was a stab at his masculinity. Unbidden by his mind, Dante found himself wondering.

_Why am I the one on the bottom? As if Vergil's skinny ass could ever overpower me!_

Back to the issue at hand, Dante scrolled to the bottom to read Trish's author's note.

'So there you have it guys. I hope you enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed writing it! As you know, this is a collaboration between me and DemonAssKickingGunnerGirl. Now, go check out some more of our stories featuring our favourite yaoi couple! x3x3x3'

Three guesses who DemonAssKickingGunnerGirl is.

_Lady…_

Dante couldn't hold in his humiliation and fury anymore. He swore. Loudly.

_Damn it! What the hell's wrong with these women?! Why, just wait till I hit that delete button…_

"Dante, what are you doing on my computer?!"

The devil hunter swirled around to face Trish, who was standing in the doorway, manicured nails clicking against the door pane in an irritated manner.

"Naturally, I'm on your computer invading your privacy. Now explain to me what the hell this," Dante waved an arm towards the screen, "IS!"

"You...you READ IT?!!" exclaimed Trish, her horror clearly expressed.

"Well duh, babe. This is freaking gross. Me and Vergil? What the hell were you and Lady thinking?!"

The blonde suddenly fell silent.

"Well..."

"Well what? You realize you just killed my rep on the Internet by writing this degrading crap," Dante glowered at the blonde.

"Well, Lady and I, and a lot of your fangirls...think..."

"Uh huh?"

"We think it's cute. You know, like an extreme form of brotherly love." Trish smiled what she hoped was a convincing grin.

Dante stared. What did she say? CUTE?! His jaw dropped and he was left speechless. Trish ignored this and strode over to the desktop, brushed him aside and took control of the mouse. She clicked on 'review' and began to read each one aloud.

"See, Dante? We've got quite a load of comments here. This one says: 'good job guys! I think Dante and Vergil make such a cute couple!'. Next one says: 'Awwww, that's adorable! Dante can never measure up to Vergil can he?' And then there's...." The blonde continued down the page.

Before she even got to review number five, however, there was a loud crashing sound to her left. Looking down, she saw that her partner was in a heap on the floor. Dante had fallen out of his chair due to the sheer humiliation of it all. By the looks of it, he was brain-dead.

Trish sighed and shook her head. This wasn't the first time fandom had killed Dante.

xxxxxxxx

A/N: Isn't it fun to make characters find out about all the stories written about them? I thought so :) I wasn't really satisfied with the ending so I fiddled around with it a bit more. This is the THIRD edited version of the ending, haha. At least now it's just over a thousand words.

P.S.: Reviews make my day :)


End file.
